I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
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