i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
