There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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