Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
you never un-have a 4some
You're breaking my sexual little heart
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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