Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize