oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i think i have two assholes
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
