just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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