We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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