So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
