Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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