if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
