There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize