just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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