whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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