Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
