I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She told me I should be a condom model.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Found your dick twin last night
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
