WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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