they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
