I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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