I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm just crazy horny about you
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
