I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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