VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
sex in a hospital.. check
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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