You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
