Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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