Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
