Me too!
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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