I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
