In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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