yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
