you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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