I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Randomize
