At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
