i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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