i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
