Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize
