the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize