Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Randomize
