He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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