i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
