singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
