: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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