No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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