this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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