i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
well most of my day revolves around power hour
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
