You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
