white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize