Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
