In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
