you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
