When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
